Confessions From the Cookie Aisle

I've done it again. A month has gone by and no writing. Why is it so hard to get out of the habit of doing something that is so good for you? And so easy to get in the habit of doing something bad?

Well, for me right now, something bad is just being lazy and not going for a walk, and buying that bag of Oreo's at Harris Teeter. Pretty scandalous.

I've always teetered on the edge of rebellion and goody-goody. I think it is because that those two descriptions describe my mom and dad-my dad being more rebellious, my mom the goody.  Maybe I got those two opposing characteristics from their opposing sensibilities. Maybe that is part of the reason they are no longer married?

Another blog, another time.

I would say it also describes both my husband and me. Although, we have done our fair share of appropriate-aged-debauchery- he undoubtedly has me beat. I have said aloud to him on several occasions that I really hope our son doesn't suffer from the same "afflictions" and addictions that we have. My husband just said dryly that "of course he will," and laughed.

I will do my best to combat it, but as we all know, you can't fight genetics all that much. You meet them, realize what they dealt you, and decide whether to give into them or take the steps to help combat them. Hence, AA meetings, different therapies, church, willpower, meditation, prayer, art, writing... whatever it takes.

I get that we always want to raise our children with the best parts of ourselves. Hoping that they will hold the best parts of us in themselves. I want to raise mine to not want things as much as experience and relationship. I want to teach him to live simply and minimally. I didn't have an extravagant childhood, but I've always had a lot of "things." Recently, we've been on a crusade to de-clutter and simplify, downsize. No big house with empty rooms, not too many excesses.  It's a mindset I'm learning.

It goes without saying I want to give my child the opportunity to crave healthy foods. My mom always tells me when I was a baby I would eat anything healthy and green. I'm not sure when that changed.  Now, to me, salad tastes like the earth, dirt.  As an adult, I try to make good decisions. I don't all the time. I will probably have some Oreo's and milk tonight before bed. It is hard to tell a pregnant lady she can't have the sweet thing.

I can only hope and pray that as he grows, he will see us, the good and the bad, and become the better pieces of us. As I guess that is what all parents hope...


His name is Haynes Edward.

Haynes after my grandmother, my mother's mother, who recently passed away. Her maiden name was Haynes and she was proud to be one, hailing from Cliffside, NC, where her daddy Sam E.  Haynes wrode the streets on his bicycle selling boiled peanuts.  Edward, inspired by Eddie Vedder from Pearl Jam.  Yes. I know, don't judge us.

When you put it all together it sounds quite presidential: Haynes Edward Reckerd. Nevermind his initials will be HER. My mom worries he will get picked on like the Boy Named Sue, but hopefully most little boys don't consider what other little boys initials spell out. And if I remember correctly, Sue turned out to be a pretty tough guy, so to me, that's a win-win.

Alright, judge me a little bit.

:)